My family members really, really like salt, probably more than they should.
“Please pass the salt” is something heard over our dinner table countless times, as is the tune “Here Comes the Bride”.
Yes, you read that correctly. Whenever I pass the salt, I pass the pepper with it, and I hum the first few bars of “Here Comes the Bride”.
Although the Nick, Jr. show “Blue’s Clues” (one of our family favorites, back in the day!) has taught kids that Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper are INDEED married*, I am convinced that surely that television relationship was born out of the real rules of etiquette, which state that salt and pepper should always be passed together because “they get lonely if separated.**”
So kids, I’m only using my manners when I’m passing the salt AND the pepper. I know you think I’m crazy, but talk to me in twenty years when you’re doing the same thing at your own dinner table. I can’t wait to see it with my own eyes.
*And I’d guess that their daughter Paprika is adopted, because really, have you ever tried to mix salt and pepper in order to make paprika? It doesn’t work.
**From Miss Manners’ Guide to the Turn-of-the-Millennium by Judith Martin (Simon & Schuster, 1990)
©2010 Suburban Scrawl