You know how you wake up on a Saturday morning and although you have a busy day of baking planned, you’re excited to write your NaBloPoMo Day fifteen blog post but you decide to get some of your other necessary tasks out of the way first, like working out and some of that baking?
And you know how you end up being in the kitchen for five hours in the afternoon because you forgot that the very worst part of participating in the Chicago Food Swap (something you haven’t done for a year because it wasn’t meshing well with your schedule) is that you simply lack the ability to ignore your life’s motto (“Go big or go home!”), and so you end up making something like eighteen loaves of chocolate chip banana bread and a bunch of mini whiskey cakes?
And you know how you go outside to check on your husband, who is taking a break from mowing the lawn/mulching the leaves, and he is sitting on the porch saying, “I’m too old to be doing this. I used to be able to do this with no problem but now I’m already sore, ugh” and you reply, “Me too with the baking all day! My back is killing me and I’m SO READY TO BE DONE” and then you both chuckle because you’re really not too old but you’re just tired?
And you know how your husband finishes the leaves and burns up some of the stick pile because it was getting out of hand and then he comes in and says, “I bet neither one of us feels like figuring out dinner tonight so why don’t we go out?” and then you go out and totally have no intention of having a drink because you might have already had a couple while you were standing in the kitchen baking all day but then you notice that apparently Justin Timberlake has “remastered” Sauza 901 tequila and since you know how much Momo loves JT you feel like it’s your duty as a good friend to try it out on her behalf, but not before sending her a text telling her all about your good deed?
And you know how you’re sitting at the table waiting for your dinner and you and your husband are both getting super sleepy and he says, “We’re never making it to ten o’clock” and you reply, “Oh yes we will because I have a blog post to write!” and then you wonder out loud how much someone like Justin Timberlake gets paid to associate his name with an alcohol brand, thinking it has to be a lot but then your brain whips itself back to that blog post which seemed like it was going to be so great when you had it in your head this morning but that was way before the workout and the baking and the drinks and the exhaustion and the longing for bedtime…
Well, that’s why I’m phoning it in today.