First, a “Non-disclosure Disclosure”: I am not being compensated in any way by the brands mentioned in this post (I WISH). The mention of their names is important to the flow of my story. Thanks for your time and attention.
J and I stopped at the grocery store last night on the way home from a post-lacrosse game dinner out with Jim, who drove separately. We were walking through the health and beauty section when J disappeared into the next aisle over.
Eventually I made my way over to him, just in time to see him place a hand on a bottle of Flintstone’s Sour Gummies vitamins.
“What do you have there???” I asked, in that tone that moms use when their kid is adding things to the grocery cart without asking permission.
“My childhood!” he stated emphatically.
Oh my. He really wanted me to buy him Flintstone’s Sour Gummies. By the way, he is sixteen years old, 5’9″, and a true “manly-man,” in his own words.
“Um, okay, well, if you really want to take vitamins,” I began, “why don’t you get ‘real’ vitamins, you know, like for ADULTS, since you’re not a kid anymore?”
He looked at me with a straight face and said, in his best whining-to-be-funny voice, “But this is my CHILDHOOD.”
I looked back at the shelf and noticed, right under the Flintstone’s vitamins, that One-A-Day now makes gummy vitamins, for adults. (Really? This cracks me up.) They have Sour Gummies, even. I pointed to the bottle and said, “If you’re going to start taking vitamins–gummy vitamins–you might as well take the adult formula, you know?” (I wasn’t sure if he’d dismiss that idea because they weren’t Flintstone’s brand–ahem, his CHILDHOOD–or if he’d be open to it because he’s very focused on fitness lately and is actually interested in benefiting from the vitamins.)
He compared the food labels on the two bottles, thought about it for a moment, and said, “Okay, One A Day Adult Sour Gummies it is.”
As we walked towards the checkout, I said, “I know you think I probably don’t need to tell you this, but I feel I must remind you that you only take ONE.”
“One a day,” he said, smiling.
“Yes, and the reason I’m telling you that is because gummy vitamins are all candy-like, and you just really need to take the correct dosage because too much can be harmful. Oh, and not that you’re a little kid anymore, but when I was a little girl I used to climb up on the kitchen counter, open up the cabinet where Grandma kept MY Flintstone’s vitamins (the chewable variety!), and I used to eat a few of them at a time.”
“Me too!” he said.
“WHAT?” I looked at him, my chin dropping nearly to the floor. “You used to do that, too???”
“Well, uh,” trying to back himself up a little bit, “only a couple times.”
I looked at him and broke out in hysterical laughter. “I guess it’s all good: we both turned out fine, right? By the way, I loved the Wilmas. How about you?”
Happy Mother’s Day to all of you moms out there!